The Six Pack

The Six Pack

The Six Pack

World domination by gin.
Regular price $375.00
/
  • Award winning gin
  • $1 shipping on orders of 4 bottles or more
  • Secure payments
  • Made in the U.K
  • 100% Recyclable
  • Handcrafted by Artisans in Sheds
Many people go to the gym for a six pack. Now you only have to go to my gin.  Three bottles of Asian Parsnip and three bottles of Navy Strength. Lift the box 20 times above your head in rapid succession as a ‘work-out’, then drink it off with a clear conscience.

Serve generously over ice with plain tonic water and a slice of fresh parsnip, in a cylinder of glass.

James Gin Asian Parsnip contains:

Parsnips - The Emperor Tiberius accepted part of the tribute payable to Rome by Germania in the form of parsnips. For the purposes of buying my gin, parsnips should not be considered a currency.

Ginger - Although used in traditional medicine and as a dietary supplement, there is no good evidence that consuming ginger or its extracts has any beneficial effect on human health. But just in case it does, it’s in the gin.

Caraway Seed - Finland supplies about 28% of the world's caraway seed. Also many of the best racing drivers. This is because the word ‘car’ appears in both job descriptions.

Cubeb Pepper - In the Chinese Tang dynasty, physicians administered cubeb pepper to restore appetite, cure "demon vapors", darken the hair, and perfume the body. My gin will also do all of these things, possibly. Let us know how you get on and send photographs.

Fenugreek - Desiccated fenugreek seeds have been recovered from the tomb of Tutankhamen. He was also quite desiccated, so these seeds are of more use in gin than in the afterlife.

Cardamom - There are two main types of cardamom - green and black. My gin contains one of them. Guess which.

Grains of Paradise - John Russell characterised grains of paradise in The Boke of Nurture (1460) as "hot and moist”. Use that information as you wish.

Liquorice Root  - The English common name is spelled "liquorice" in most of the Commonwealth, but "licorice" in the United States. This is because Americans can’t spell.

Sweet Orange - Since you ask, the colour was named after the fruit in about 1512.

Juniper - Gin must contain juniper or it isn’t gin. In fact, the name ‘gin’ is a shortening of the Dutch word for juniper, ‘jenever’. Not to be confused with ‘Geneva’ which is both a place and a convention but not a drink.

Angelica Root  - Angelica Root was also the name of a famous 1920s blues singer from the Mississippi region. Here, it's botanical.

Coriander Seed  - Some people are genetically indisposed towards coriander, and believe it tastes of soap. They’re just weirdos, so it’s in the gin.

Water - Asian Parsnip gin is diluted to 40% ABV (or 57% for Navy Strength) by adding water. Because we appreciate the work of 19th century civil engineers, we use tap water; not hand-drawn Highland Spring or Wiltshire chalk stream water, because it wouldn’t be as good.


Your States are not quite United as we can’t currently ship to these places. Sorry.

Iowa, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Alabama, Alaska, Guam, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, & Utah.

If you’re living anywhere else, good news. - you can check our shipping details here.

'Pretty f'ing amazing'

'I expected this gin to be pretty good, but it is absolutely amazing, outstanding, smooth, unique. Who knew Asian Parsnips could do this to gin. Seriously, bravo'.

P. WOOD

Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)

Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)

Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)

Regular price $341.94
/

Yo dudes,

Before you order a bottle of award-winning* Asian Parsnip, think about this. For the shipping cost of one bottle, I can ship you a case of six. Think carefully: once you have drunk one bottle, you’ll want another, probably immediately. Would you rather sit there for weeks while HMS Dullsville plods across the Atlantic with your next order, or simply pluck it from your drinks globe/sideboard/secret place in the garden privy? Thought so.

I am quite simply driving down the per-unit cost of Asian Parsnip as my contribution to making the USA even greater. You’re most welcome.

* It’s only a matter of time.
JM

 

In accordance with industry regulations all orders are processed and fulfilled through Passion Spirits’ national network of licensed retailers.

Watch the story

EPISODE ONE • CHEMISTRY 101

Recently viewed
Sold Out
American Ramstud
$56.99
Asian Parsnip
$56.99
Navy Strength Asian Parsnip (batch 2)
$69.99
Navy Strength Asian Parsnip (Batch 2 - 6 PACK)
$419.94
Asian Parsnip - Full case (6 pack)
$341.94